Why We Crave Drama

Something that is interesting about people is the seemingly inherent need for drama. Even if you don't think you want it, there seems to be something that pulls you into a juicy story or a venting rage. Or is that just me?

I've been thinking about this a lot lately, and I think I've put my finger on it. To explain, I first need to present a detailed analogy.

One Christmas, my cousin gave my little brother an old west style fort made out of wooden blocks. That fort, simple as it was, substantially changed our play time. We invented the most time consuming and intense game yet. The premise was simple: you have spring, summer, and fall to plan, grow, build, and trade. Then, winter comes, and the fortmaster would determine whether or not you survived the winter.

Our neighbors, 5 siblings close in age to us and each other, my brother, my sister, and I were the contestants. We each had a plot of bedroom carpet staked out. And then, we'd have a free for all to vie for starting capital. The toy box was opened and you grabbed like mad for my brother's farm animals, cowboys, marbles, socks, anything that could possibly be helpful, until time was up. That's when trading began.

Of course, we were kind of cutthroats, but we were also endlessly creative. We were almost manic in the way we gathered, traded, and prepared for an imaginary winter and it's dangers. Of course, there was little real danger except for the danger of the fortmaster's declaring a disappointing, or embarrassing fate. We loved that too; creativity in explaining that you didn't have enough blankets or firewood, so you had to cut open a cow and sleep in it for the last 2 weeks of winter (we obviously, had just recently watched Star Wars: Empire Strikes Back), was crucial to making the game fun. It was invigorating to have the sensation of fighting something huge and dangerous, and, yet, being completely safe.

I think that the gossip and drama of life can be the same way. We create a temporary enemy, a person who has upset us or done something we dislike. This feeling of conflict brings an adrenaline rush because we are choosing to fight, even if our enemy is not present (they usually aren't). And yet, there is seldom any real danger. We can criticize, theorize, and even demonize a person or group of people in the safety of like-minded people with very little chance of anything happening. Essentially, participating in gossip and negativity is giving us a rush of adrenaline without any risk.

I assume, like most chemical induced responses, this can be addictive. I guess that's why it's so easy to slip into the cycle of negativity. Hopefully this isn't coming off as self-righteous or preachy, it's just that I've been trying to eliminate some of the negativity in my life, but it's turned out to be hard. It's really hard. And I think thinking about it this way has given me a little bit more objective way of looking at these situations as they come up. Hopefully that will help me to try to deal with things in a positive way instead of wallowing in negativity because my brain loves the chemical hit is gets when I fight an imaginary battle.