Friend's Mother: Aubrey! You just got married, right? Congratulations!
Me: Oh, no. I'm not married.
Friend's Mother: You just got engaged then?
Me: No.
Friend's Mother: Oh... pause...
Me: Um... I just graduated from college.
I felt like I really let her down. It turns out she had confused me with one of my close friends.
Relatedly, I've been substitute teaching, and at the school where I went today this happened:
Girl 1: So, are you married?
Me: Nope.
Girl 2: Duh, she's not married, she's only like 17.
Me: (probably a little defensively) I'm not 17.
Girl 1: Oh, well, are you getting married? Because I could totally see you getting married.
Me: Um... not right now.
Well... at least I'm "the cutest substitute teacher [they]'ve ever had" with "nice hair" and the air of someone who is about to get married. I guess that should be encouraging.
People seem to be truly distressed about me being single. I'm possibly going to start wearing my great-grandmother's wedding ring that I inherited and make up a fake husband.
5 comments:
Can his name be Gilbert? Gilbert Watson, because being called Mrs. Watson would be pretty awesome ... just saying ;)
See my recent posting on The Feminine Mystique. Betty will make all the rude people who focus all their attentions on marriage much, much less rude. (Really, when Did I become such a feminist?)
Yeah, Aubrey
Didn't you know that the only important things in the Utah school system are being married and having good hair? Seriously!
People can so strange sometimes. But instead of making up a husband and turning a family heirloom into a prop, you can always come up with a tasteful yet startling lie to scare them into not asking about it anymore. That'd work.
You are absolutely right! Any suggestions for a tasteful and startling lie?
How about: "When I was diagnosed with terminal cancer I knew that I would never be able to marry, but thank you for your concern (stifled sob as I walk away)."
Of course... that might not be tasteful at all...
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