Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Well, that was exactly the sort of thing I was trying to avoid...

So, I had the most mortifying experience today. First off, a little background info: I am in the middle of my English teaching practicum, which is sort of like a pre-student teaching experience. I love it. I teach three 7th grade English classes, and those kids are fantastically funny and cute. Here's the thing though... it's jr. high. I don't know if you remember, but kids in jr. high are mean. And, they can be especially mean to teachers, and even more especially terrible to student teachers. Remembering all of the horrible things that we said and did to student teachers when I was that age, I have been very, very careful not to give them any sort of ammunition. You know, keep all of my strange make-fun-able characteristics to myself. And it was going so well... until today.
What happened: I got up bright and early, showered, and then put on some lotion someone had given me. It was wildflower lotion... in theory. I go to the jr. high and do a fun little review activity about metaphors and similes with the kids. After the activity is done, I am collecting some papers, and when I get to the last desk this boy is like, "You smell like celery." I was mortified. I said, "That's weird." And I think the poor kid thought I meant that he was weird (they are very sensitive about that), and so I asked nervously, "Like I smell grossly or weirdly much like celery?" And he said "No; just like celery, it's not bad." Still wanted to die.
Great, I will be the celery teacher. She was nice, but she smelled like celery. Fantastic.
I go back to my desk and am trying to figure out why this is the case. And then it comes to me... the lotion. Wildflowers, no. Celery, maybe. Needless to say, I am not ever using that lotion again.

*On a less distressing note, here's a gem from the simile/metaphor discussion:
Teacher (not me, the real teacher): What did it mean when Shakespeare wrote "Juliet is the sun"?
Student: She's hot!
Other Student: Probably, Romeo was a ladies' man.